This is not exactly the most recommended method of handling your child but when you've exhausted all other reasonable options, sometimes reverse psychology works (at least in part).
Aurora was refusing to stay in her room and was at the point where she thought being returned to her room (or any interaction with a person) was a game and was giggling maniacally while racing off around the house (endangering sick Quinn's sleep). We're trying to teach her to stay in her room at night rather than locking the door but she is extremely resistant to obeying no matter the consequences of disobeying (we've always had a hard time finding consequences that actually motivate her to obey; this story is yet another reminder of that).
Wil finally gave up and said, "Fine. If you're coming out of your room, it must be morning. Give me your pjs and get dressed." He stripped her PJs and gave her a dress and started opening the windows. Aurora stood there in shock for a minute, then started exclaiming, "It's nighttime, Daddy! It's nighttime!" Wil would answer, "If it's nighttime, you would be in your bed. You're out here, so it must be morning." She was totally boggled and began passionately explaining, "Daddy! You're messing up the CREATION STORY! This ISN'T how the world WORKS! You're messing it up, Daddy! It's nighttime! That's how God made it! You're messing up how God made it! It's nighttime! That's how the world WORKS! You're MESSING UP CREATION!!!"
Poor kiddo. She did eventually go to her room after passionately trying to convince Wil that it is indeed nighttime. Now that she's in her room and is quiet, he has been convinced. ;)
~Regina
(I feel the need to add that people should try to just enjoy the funny story and not give in to the urge to offer parenting advice, if they feel that need. When Aurora hits the point she did tonight, any interaction however calm and any consequence however severe feeds her out-of-control emotional state. She doesn't care what feedback she's getting, she feeds off anything she gets. Distracting her with a shocking logical argument may have been the best way to jolt her out of it. Heaven knows we try hard to prevent these things from happening.)
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Confessions of a Worn-Out Mommy
I haven't been blogging much at all for the past 6 months. The kids are taking up more time and attention (I thought they needed more attention when they were babies!) and, most importantly, more energy. But mainly I've been pouring myself into trying to figure out Aurora.
I haven't talked much about our struggles with Aurora here on the blog. I've tried to keep most things here about the happy, fun memories mixed in with some of the less-appealing stuff that might help others (like Quinn's food issues and sleep issues). If you're friends with me on Facebook, you've gotten more glimpses of our struggles to parent our sweet girl.
This year, back in April, we decided to try to find out if there's more we can do to help her. After 6 months, all we know is that Aurora is a puzzle. At home, according to several standard assessment forms, she has a strong likelihood of having something going on. In the testing environment, most of those same issues showed up, but not as strongly. Professionals who interact with Aurora and then look at her test results are puzzled because of the dichotomy between how she appears in person versus how she appears on paper.
Wil and I, however, don't see the dichotomy. The assessments that have been conducted are dead-on for the Aurora we know. Because of this, 4 different professionals have recommended we find a way to put Aurora into an environment where she will spend extended time with other adults to see if those adults see the same issues and how severe the issues are. So, starting next Monday, Aurora will be attending preschool 9 hours a week (2 days a week, 4.5 hours each day). It's not a lot but hopefully it will give us the information we need and give me the break I need to be able to engage Aurora when she's home.
That's the other side of the issue: I'm hitting my limit of meeting her needs. As every mother does, I have poured myself into getting to know my child and finding out how she ticks. I've researched, sought advice, and worked things out. I know her better than anyone else on this planet but I'm at a point where I don't know what she needs or what will help her handle the world better. I feel like we've tried everything, found the things that work best for her, and it's still not good enough. There is either something that we're totally missing or there's something extra going on here. We aren't sure what it is, which is why we are seeking professional help. I cannot give her what she needs and I have exhausted the limits of my knowledge and energy. I've been working on the bare minimum for the past couple months and it shows.
So that's the hole I've been hiding in for the past 6 or so months. Hopefully soon I'll be able to catch up on blogging but it's not the priority. I mainly want to keep blogging because it's the only place I record our family's adventures and stories. For now, I'm trying to keep up on my picture a day blog and our Tumblr.
~Regina
I haven't talked much about our struggles with Aurora here on the blog. I've tried to keep most things here about the happy, fun memories mixed in with some of the less-appealing stuff that might help others (like Quinn's food issues and sleep issues). If you're friends with me on Facebook, you've gotten more glimpses of our struggles to parent our sweet girl.
This year, back in April, we decided to try to find out if there's more we can do to help her. After 6 months, all we know is that Aurora is a puzzle. At home, according to several standard assessment forms, she has a strong likelihood of having something going on. In the testing environment, most of those same issues showed up, but not as strongly. Professionals who interact with Aurora and then look at her test results are puzzled because of the dichotomy between how she appears in person versus how she appears on paper.
Wil and I, however, don't see the dichotomy. The assessments that have been conducted are dead-on for the Aurora we know. Because of this, 4 different professionals have recommended we find a way to put Aurora into an environment where she will spend extended time with other adults to see if those adults see the same issues and how severe the issues are. So, starting next Monday, Aurora will be attending preschool 9 hours a week (2 days a week, 4.5 hours each day). It's not a lot but hopefully it will give us the information we need and give me the break I need to be able to engage Aurora when she's home.
That's the other side of the issue: I'm hitting my limit of meeting her needs. As every mother does, I have poured myself into getting to know my child and finding out how she ticks. I've researched, sought advice, and worked things out. I know her better than anyone else on this planet but I'm at a point where I don't know what she needs or what will help her handle the world better. I feel like we've tried everything, found the things that work best for her, and it's still not good enough. There is either something that we're totally missing or there's something extra going on here. We aren't sure what it is, which is why we are seeking professional help. I cannot give her what she needs and I have exhausted the limits of my knowledge and energy. I've been working on the bare minimum for the past couple months and it shows.
So that's the hole I've been hiding in for the past 6 or so months. Hopefully soon I'll be able to catch up on blogging but it's not the priority. I mainly want to keep blogging because it's the only place I record our family's adventures and stories. For now, I'm trying to keep up on my picture a day blog and our Tumblr.
~Regina
Wednesday, September 11, 2013
Quinn is TWO!!
I've slacked off on blogging a bit but I can't miss a birthday post! We celebrated Quinn's birthday yesterday because Wil won't be able to be home much today.
It's hard to believe that this tiny little mister
is a big boy now!
But the hit toy of the evening was the Duplo my parents sent.
The first present Quinn opened was a set and the kids spent a good 20 minutes playing with it before they remembered that there were more presents to open! Hehe.
And, of course, his birthday meal was a hit! He loooooves chicken legs. Silly kid.
And the main event: the cake!
"My! My! My!"
Quinn actually ended up being afraid of the candles but I didn't realize it until after we'd tried to get him to blow them out. Poor fellow.
But all was forgotten once he got his slice of cake.
Yummy!
Happy birthday, Quinn!
~Regina
As a reminder: I may not post on this blog very often right now, but I am keeping up on our picture a day blog over at Snapshots of 2013.
It's hard to believe that this tiny little mister
is a big boy now!
He really, really got into opening presents. He was so excited to see what was inside each package. :)
But the hit toy of the evening was the Duplo my parents sent.
The first present Quinn opened was a set and the kids spent a good 20 minutes playing with it before they remembered that there were more presents to open! Hehe.
And, of course, his birthday meal was a hit! He loooooves chicken legs. Silly kid.
And the main event: the cake!
"My! My! My!"
Quinn actually ended up being afraid of the candles but I didn't realize it until after we'd tried to get him to blow them out. Poor fellow.
But all was forgotten once he got his slice of cake.
Yummy!
Happy birthday, Quinn!
~Regina
As a reminder: I may not post on this blog very often right now, but I am keeping up on our picture a day blog over at Snapshots of 2013.
Friday, July 26, 2013
One, two, FIVE!
We have discovered that Aurora remembers things better if we tell her to do things in a numbered list. So we say: "One, go get your shoes. Two, put them on. Three, go get your water bottle." Normally she has trouble with doing these sorts of tasks because she gets distracted--usually before even completing the first part of the command. However, with numbering the required steps, she seems to remember she has three things to do and can generally get farther in the list. Well, I just had a hilarious (to me) conversation with Aurora that tells me she seems to like the numbered lists.
Aurora called me to her room after bedtime and tells me there's something she has to tell me....
Aurora: ONE! We don't have any presents for my birthday.
Me: That's true, we don't have any presents for your birthday yet because it's 6 months away.
Aurora: TWO! But if we did have presents for my birthday, they would be in a room and covered!
Me: Yes, that makes sense. *waits for her to continue* So is there a three?
Aurora: No, that's all.
Me: OK, goodnight Aurora.
Aurora: WAIT! Let me finish!
Me: Yes?
Aurora: FIVE!
Me: I thought you were on three.
Aurora: No, five. If we have a whole bunch of presents in a room they would be covered.
Me: Yes, we went over that...
Aurora: And LAST! We would have lots of decorations and stuff and presents...and COMPLICATED presents!
Me: Uh-huh. Goodnight, Aurora.
~Regina
Aurora called me to her room after bedtime and tells me there's something she has to tell me....
Aurora: ONE! We don't have any presents for my birthday.
Me: That's true, we don't have any presents for your birthday yet because it's 6 months away.
Aurora: TWO! But if we did have presents for my birthday, they would be in a room and covered!
Me: Yes, that makes sense. *waits for her to continue* So is there a three?
Aurora: No, that's all.
Me: OK, goodnight Aurora.
Aurora: WAIT! Let me finish!
Me: Yes?
Aurora: FIVE!
Me: I thought you were on three.
Aurora: No, five. If we have a whole bunch of presents in a room they would be covered.
Me: Yes, we went over that...
Aurora: And LAST! We would have lots of decorations and stuff and presents...and COMPLICATED presents!
Me: Uh-huh. Goodnight, Aurora.
~Regina
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Spiritual Conversations with a 4 Year Old
I just had an interesting conversation with Aurora that I want to write down to remember. I'm sure we'll be having more of these as she gets older.
Previously, she had asked where God lives and so I had explained a little bit about there being a spiritual world where God and heaven are and that we'll go live with Him there eventually.
Tonight, Aurora came out of her room, informing me that we forgot to pray. So I took her into her room and prayed with her and then she prayed, specifically asking Jesus to not leave her alone. When she was done, I reminded her of the verse in the Bible where Jesus said He would never leave us and then told her a little bit about how God sent part of Himself to live in us (the Holy Spirit) and that He would never leave us. Then followed this conversation (ignore any theological errors and gaps, please, I was trying to bring all this down to a 4 year old's level and I didn't exactly have time to plan this conversation out):
Aurora: But, Mommy, didn't God leave Adam and Eve when they sinned?
Me: .....Well, no, not completely. God could not walk right next to them or sit with them after they sinned but He always watched over them, always heard when they prayed, and still talked to them in response. He just couldn't be right with them. It's like when you're in your room for quiet time and the door is shut and I'm in my room. You are by yourself in your room but I can hear you and talk to you, so I haven't completely left you alone; we're just not together in the exact same place.
Aurora: Mommy, what happens when everyone goes into the spiritual world? Does the earth get destroyed?
Me: ............ Um...well...the Bible tells us that the Earth will get destroyed, but we really don't know how that will happen.
Aurora: How will it happen, Mommy?
Me: Well, the Bible tells some stories that say the Earth will get destroyed with fire, but there are lots of ways that fire can destroy things, so we don't really know exactly how it will happen.
Aurora: *looking worried* What about all the things on the Earth? Will all the things come to the spiritual world with us?
Me: The Bible tells us that God will make a new Earth for everyone. Everything that is important will be there with us.
Aurora: What about your ring, Mommy?
Me: *sigh* Aurora, what would happen if my ring got lost? Would it change whether mommy and daddy were married or whether we love each other?
Aurora: No.... *lower lip starts quivering*
Me: I'm NOT going to lose my ring...my ring is very special, but it is just something that shows others that Daddy and I love each other. Even if the ring got lost, we would still love each other very much and still be married. Those kind of important things are what will go with us. I don't know if my ring will be in the spiritual world, but Daddy and I will still love each other and you and Quinn.
Aurora: What about my glowy friend (nightlight)?
Me: Well...in the Bible, it says that God will be the sun for the new Earth. He is so bright and beautiful and shiny that there's not going to be nighttime anywhere on the new Earth...so you won't really need your glowy friend. But God knows you love it and it is very special, so maybe there will be a glowy friend there for you.
Aurora: No night? But what will people do when they get tired?
Me: On the new Earth, people's bodies won't work the same. God will make our bodies perfect. We won't need to sleep.
Aurora: *yawn*
Me: OK, Aurora, bedtime.
Previously, she had asked where God lives and so I had explained a little bit about there being a spiritual world where God and heaven are and that we'll go live with Him there eventually.
Tonight, Aurora came out of her room, informing me that we forgot to pray. So I took her into her room and prayed with her and then she prayed, specifically asking Jesus to not leave her alone. When she was done, I reminded her of the verse in the Bible where Jesus said He would never leave us and then told her a little bit about how God sent part of Himself to live in us (the Holy Spirit) and that He would never leave us. Then followed this conversation (ignore any theological errors and gaps, please, I was trying to bring all this down to a 4 year old's level and I didn't exactly have time to plan this conversation out):
Aurora: But, Mommy, didn't God leave Adam and Eve when they sinned?
Me: .....Well, no, not completely. God could not walk right next to them or sit with them after they sinned but He always watched over them, always heard when they prayed, and still talked to them in response. He just couldn't be right with them. It's like when you're in your room for quiet time and the door is shut and I'm in my room. You are by yourself in your room but I can hear you and talk to you, so I haven't completely left you alone; we're just not together in the exact same place.
Aurora: Mommy, what happens when everyone goes into the spiritual world? Does the earth get destroyed?
Me: ............ Um...well...the Bible tells us that the Earth will get destroyed, but we really don't know how that will happen.
Aurora: How will it happen, Mommy?
Me: Well, the Bible tells some stories that say the Earth will get destroyed with fire, but there are lots of ways that fire can destroy things, so we don't really know exactly how it will happen.
Aurora: *looking worried* What about all the things on the Earth? Will all the things come to the spiritual world with us?
Me: The Bible tells us that God will make a new Earth for everyone. Everything that is important will be there with us.
Aurora: What about your ring, Mommy?
Me: *sigh* Aurora, what would happen if my ring got lost? Would it change whether mommy and daddy were married or whether we love each other?
Aurora: No.... *lower lip starts quivering*
Me: I'm NOT going to lose my ring...my ring is very special, but it is just something that shows others that Daddy and I love each other. Even if the ring got lost, we would still love each other very much and still be married. Those kind of important things are what will go with us. I don't know if my ring will be in the spiritual world, but Daddy and I will still love each other and you and Quinn.
Aurora: What about my glowy friend (nightlight)?
Me: Well...in the Bible, it says that God will be the sun for the new Earth. He is so bright and beautiful and shiny that there's not going to be nighttime anywhere on the new Earth...so you won't really need your glowy friend. But God knows you love it and it is very special, so maybe there will be a glowy friend there for you.
Aurora: No night? But what will people do when they get tired?
Me: On the new Earth, people's bodies won't work the same. God will make our bodies perfect. We won't need to sleep.
Aurora: *yawn*
Me: OK, Aurora, bedtime.
Friday, July 5, 2013
Tooooo Haaaww!
Quinn still nurses several times a day. This evening as I was putting him down for bedtime, he asked to nurse. As soon as his lips touched my skin, he jerked back and exclaimed, "Too haw!! TOOOOO HAAAAAW!" (too hot). Then he nursed normally.
I switched him to the other side and once again, he jerked back and exclaimed, "Too haw!" Then he added: "Is soo haw!" and started blowing on me, as though to cool me off. He kept repeating, "Is so haw!" and blowing on me until I finally convinced him that I was supposed to feel a little bit warm!
I was nearly cracking up, but needed to stay quiet to help him calm down. Seriously, nursing a talking baby is way better than when they're little. They're just so funny and the interactions are so sweet.
(He's going to hold it against me when he's older for posting this story but I couldn't resist the cuteness!)
~Regina
I switched him to the other side and once again, he jerked back and exclaimed, "Too haw!" Then he added: "Is soo haw!" and started blowing on me, as though to cool me off. He kept repeating, "Is so haw!" and blowing on me until I finally convinced him that I was supposed to feel a little bit warm!
I was nearly cracking up, but needed to stay quiet to help him calm down. Seriously, nursing a talking baby is way better than when they're little. They're just so funny and the interactions are so sweet.
(He's going to hold it against me when he's older for posting this story but I couldn't resist the cuteness!)
~Regina
Monday, June 10, 2013
Poor Birdy
Quinn was investigating the laundry room to see if he could get outside
(he couldn't, because the door was locked) when he came running in to
get me, upset and whimpering. He pulled me to the backdoor and when I
looked out, I saw a rather confused looking pigeon with some feathers
missing.
We carefully opened the door and looked at the bird from the doorway. Quinn was excited and wanted to try to touch the bird, but I convinced him that we needed to get food and water for the bird. So we got a little plate and filled it with some grain (no bird seed around here, unfortunately) and water and scooted it within a couple feet of the bird.
Quinn was so upset that he couldn't watch the bird that I took down his webcam in his room and set it up on the kitchen windowsill so that we could watch the bird. I'm pretty sure the bird won't care about anything we offered it and will fly away when it's less confused, but Quinn is pretty excited about the birdcam. :)
Here's a screenshot from the webcam. It's really bad quality, but if you look closely inside the circle, there is a little blob that's the bird.
And this is Quinn not understanding that to best help the bird, we need to leave it alone...
He just wants to keep the bird company! :(
~Regina
We carefully opened the door and looked at the bird from the doorway. Quinn was excited and wanted to try to touch the bird, but I convinced him that we needed to get food and water for the bird. So we got a little plate and filled it with some grain (no bird seed around here, unfortunately) and water and scooted it within a couple feet of the bird.
Quinn was so upset that he couldn't watch the bird that I took down his webcam in his room and set it up on the kitchen windowsill so that we could watch the bird. I'm pretty sure the bird won't care about anything we offered it and will fly away when it's less confused, but Quinn is pretty excited about the birdcam. :)
Here's a screenshot from the webcam. It's really bad quality, but if you look closely inside the circle, there is a little blob that's the bird.
And this is Quinn not understanding that to best help the bird, we need to leave it alone...
He just wants to keep the bird company! :(
~Regina
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Aurora and the cake
We were at a birthday party tonight and while wandering around, Aurora
was drawn to the cake. Then she decided to grab it--not just touch it,
but actually grab it with both hands and try to sink her hands into it! What??? Thankfully, she jerked
back from it when she realized it was covered in frosting (a texture she doesn't particularly like) so she only
left hand impressions in the icing without actually ruining the cake.
Our hostess was very gracious and merely laughed as she watched Aurora do this. I was rather shocked, but also should have seen it coming. Aurora just said she wanted to feel it. She knew it was the cake and that it was covered in icing, but apparently she couldn't keep her hands off of it.
Note to self: if we are ever around any other cakes, I need to stay between it and Aurora. :) I wish I knew what was going through her head sometimes...
~Regina
Our hostess was very gracious and merely laughed as she watched Aurora do this. I was rather shocked, but also should have seen it coming. Aurora just said she wanted to feel it. She knew it was the cake and that it was covered in icing, but apparently she couldn't keep her hands off of it.
Note to self: if we are ever around any other cakes, I need to stay between it and Aurora. :) I wish I knew what was going through her head sometimes...
~Regina
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Silly Kids Stories :)
Quinn has been waking up from naps fairly unhappy these days. Usually getting him a snack helps, so I'll often let him out of his room and then go get him a snack while he follows me to the kitchen, crying the whole way. Yesterday, he was particularly pitiful. His cry was literally a "boo-hoo-hoo-hoo" with a raspberry on the beginning "b." It was adorable and sad at the same time.
Aurora decided to dump a bunch of water into our drier one day while I was taking care of Quinn's diaper. I came back to find our laundry room floor covered in a nice layer of water and the drum of the drier about as full of water as it could be. Later that night, after I'd calmed down about the whole thing, I asked Aurora why she decided to put water in the drier...She told me it was an experiment. Well, at least she came up with a good reason. (And, yes, she got a nice lecture about asking permission before doing experiments so that we can make sure she doesn't do an experiment that could hurt something or someone.)
Quinn is talking all the time these days! He doesn't always say real words, but I'm pretty sure most of the time he's trying to form real words. The cadence and syllables in his words often match up to real words and sentences even when none of the words sound much like what we're pretty sure he's trying to say. He's even trying to say full sentences, which is just amazing to me for a 20 month old!
The other night, we were looking for his lovey and asked him, "Where is lion?" He answered with what sounded like "Where did it go?" and started looking for it. His understandable (to us) words are: thank you, no, all done, uh-oh, yes, car, ball, toot-toot (train), daddy, momma, poppa, go, hello, up, amen, woah!, bubbles, bye-bye, Aurora (he has a couple variations on her name). His phrases include: "not all done"/"all done," "thank you"/"no thank you," "1,2,3!," "I jump,!" "I did it!," and a few other "I ____" type phrases. He might even say his name sometimes, but I'm not sure. It's not like the "qu" sound is the easiest to say...
When Aurora gets hurt, rather than asking for a bandaid, she goes looking for silk to rub over the wound. This works OK as long as it's a bruise or scrape that isn't bleeding...
Quinn has started pushing people around. He's strong enough to give a good shove, but not really to push people over...yet. However, Aurora has decided she likes the falling-down game, so when ever Quinn gives her the slightest push, she throws herself down on the ground and exclaims that Quinn gave her such a big push that she couldn't stay standing! She doesn't like Quinn pushing her, but she hasn't figured out that reacting to every push by throwing herself on the ground only encourages him.
~Regina
Friday, May 24, 2013
Summer Fun!
Summer is finally getting here! It's been a strange spring here in Tennessee but the weather is finally warming up and the and I have been loving playing outside all day long. :) So one warm morning earlier this week, I squirted some baby wash into the kiddie pool and filled it up. Hours of fun ensued. Water+bubbles=awesome!
Some window washing was attempted....
And later, after drying off, Aurora showed off her dance moves...
I think she could do that all day long if she didn't fall down so much!
~Regina
Some window washing was attempted....
And later, after drying off, Aurora showed off her dance moves...
I think she could do that all day long if she didn't fall down so much!
~Regina
Friday, May 17, 2013
Aurora Loves Fabrics
Aurora has recently become aware that there are many different kinds of fabrics. Since she's currently obsessed with princesses, she likes to talk about their clothes and what they're made of and things like that. I think she's going to loooove sewing when she gets older. But recently, she's been very curious about what people around her are wearing and we saw this firsthand this morning...
Today we
were at a playdate and Aurora started going around to each of the moms
and touching or stroking their clothes, hair, and whatever else they
were wearing. She loves touching everything! She was talking to each of the moms and they didn't seem to
mind, so I chose not to worry about it. Later, one of the moms came up
and complimented me on how sweet Aurora is because while she
was touching everyone and everything, she was telling them how beautiful
they were and what nice things they were wearing. Apparently, it made
several moms' days. :D
What a sweetie!
~Regina
Thursday, May 16, 2013
What a Sweet Big Sister!
We have noticed that, of course, Quinn is more likely to imitate something when Aurora says or does it than he will do with us. Most of the time this is not the greatest things, but sometimes it works out well.
This morning as breakfast was wrapping up, Aurora and Quinn were waiting to have some pieces of mango. Aurora decided to wipe her face with her pjs (!!) and I came out to find both kids happily wiping their faces with whatever part of their clothing they could pull up.
As I passed out the mango pieces, Aurora said, "Say 'Mango,' Quinn. Say 'mango!'" Quinn grinned and responded, "mah-GO!" They went back and forth several times: "Mango!" "mah-GO!" "Mango!" "mah-GO!" until they were giggling so much they couldn't talk.
Then Quinn started getting impatient while waiting for me to make his mango into smaller pieces. Aurora said, "Say, 'please,' Quinn." and demonstrated the sign. Quinn made some sound that didn't sound even close to "please" but tried to make the sign (which I have unsuccessfully tried to teach him over the past couple months). Aurora exclaimed, "That was close! Yay Quinn!"
It was all just so sweet. What a good big sister Aurora is. I feel like they're just the perfect siblings for each other. :)
~Regina
This morning as breakfast was wrapping up, Aurora and Quinn were waiting to have some pieces of mango. Aurora decided to wipe her face with her pjs (!!) and I came out to find both kids happily wiping their faces with whatever part of their clothing they could pull up.
As I passed out the mango pieces, Aurora said, "Say 'Mango,' Quinn. Say 'mango!'" Quinn grinned and responded, "mah-GO!" They went back and forth several times: "Mango!" "mah-GO!" "Mango!" "mah-GO!" until they were giggling so much they couldn't talk.
Then Quinn started getting impatient while waiting for me to make his mango into smaller pieces. Aurora said, "Say, 'please,' Quinn." and demonstrated the sign. Quinn made some sound that didn't sound even close to "please" but tried to make the sign (which I have unsuccessfully tried to teach him over the past couple months). Aurora exclaimed, "That was close! Yay Quinn!"
It was all just so sweet. What a good big sister Aurora is. I feel like they're just the perfect siblings for each other. :)
~Regina
Monday, May 13, 2013
Actions have Consequences
I know you aren't supposed to compare your kids, but sometimes the
differences between our two amaze me. This is one of those things...
We were eating breakfast and Aurora finished her breakfast and got some fruit. Quinn, who had 3-4 more bites of his food left, pushed his bowl away and said, "Ah dum!" (all done). He was ready for fruit, too!
I explained to him that when he had finished his food, then he could have fruit. I showed him Aurora's bowl and his bowl and restated that he needed to finish his food before he got fruit. He was very angry about this and cried for 5 or so minutes. Then, after I once again told him he could have fruit after finishing his food, he grabbed his bowl and gobbled down his breakfast. He was quite happy when he got his fruit.
Aurora at this age wouldn't have even understood that explanation or maybe just not cared about it. She would have thrown a fit and carried on and on until the table were cleared. She wouldn't have finished her breakfast and wouldn't have gotten fruit. We actually have been fairly careful not to set up situations like that for her even now because she still doesn't always grasp the concept or feels the need to fight it to her detriment.
But Quinn... he gets it most of the time. He seems to understand that if he does or doesn't do something, something else does or doesn't happen. He will generally protest for a while and then cooperate. Usually these things are very small, immediate consequences, like eating breakfast and then getting fruit or picking up toys and then getting new toys, but he amazes me with his understanding.
It's so interesting how different kids' brains work! I love watching their personalities emerge! :)
~Regina
We were eating breakfast and Aurora finished her breakfast and got some fruit. Quinn, who had 3-4 more bites of his food left, pushed his bowl away and said, "Ah dum!" (all done). He was ready for fruit, too!
I explained to him that when he had finished his food, then he could have fruit. I showed him Aurora's bowl and his bowl and restated that he needed to finish his food before he got fruit. He was very angry about this and cried for 5 or so minutes. Then, after I once again told him he could have fruit after finishing his food, he grabbed his bowl and gobbled down his breakfast. He was quite happy when he got his fruit.
Aurora at this age wouldn't have even understood that explanation or maybe just not cared about it. She would have thrown a fit and carried on and on until the table were cleared. She wouldn't have finished her breakfast and wouldn't have gotten fruit. We actually have been fairly careful not to set up situations like that for her even now because she still doesn't always grasp the concept or feels the need to fight it to her detriment.
But Quinn... he gets it most of the time. He seems to understand that if he does or doesn't do something, something else does or doesn't happen. He will generally protest for a while and then cooperate. Usually these things are very small, immediate consequences, like eating breakfast and then getting fruit or picking up toys and then getting new toys, but he amazes me with his understanding.
It's so interesting how different kids' brains work! I love watching their personalities emerge! :)
~Regina
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Pillow Racing!
Our silly kiddos have such fun playing together. This pillow racing game cracked me up.
This also makes me wonder if I should mop the floor more often since those pillows are the ones Quinn sleeps on...
~Regina
This also makes me wonder if I should mop the floor more often since those pillows are the ones Quinn sleeps on...
~Regina
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Princesses and Pancakes
Aurora was sitting and staring into space at the dinner table, her pancakes untouched in front of her...
Wil (goofily): Aurora, what 'cha thinking about?
Aurora: I'm not telling you!
W: Is it about rainbows?
A: No....
Regina: Is it about unicorns?
A: No...
W: Is it about flowers?
A: No...
R: Is it about cats?
A: No....
R: Is it about marshmallows?
A: No....
W: Is it about games?
A: No....
R: Is it about princesses?
A: Ye-hehehe-s! *giggles more*
W: What were you thinking about princesses?
A: I was thinking about how princesses eat pancakes!
~Regina
Wil (goofily): Aurora, what 'cha thinking about?
Aurora: I'm not telling you!
W: Is it about rainbows?
A: No....
Regina: Is it about unicorns?
A: No...
W: Is it about flowers?
A: No...
R: Is it about cats?
A: No....
R: Is it about marshmallows?
A: No....
W: Is it about games?
A: No....
R: Is it about princesses?
A: Ye-hehehe-s! *giggles more*
W: What were you thinking about princesses?
A: I was thinking about how princesses eat pancakes!
~Regina
Friday, April 26, 2013
Aurora's Secret Garden
Yesterday while in the car, Aurora started telling us about her secret garden that no one else is allowed in. It was so much fun to hear in such detail about her pretend world. She rarely tells us this much about anything special to her.
After I turned off the camera, she informed Wil and me that we are the mean king and queen and that we aren't allowed to go into the garden. Hehe. Yeah, mommy and daddy have to be mean sometimes....guess she can hold it against us a bit when it comes to her pretend secret garden.
(And, no, she is not familiar with the story The Secret Garden at all. The only thing I can think of that gave her this idea is that I talked to her one time about developing a relaxation visualization and mentioned at that time that I have one I use to help myself go to sleep. I think that's what she's remembering when she asks to see my garden.)
~Regina
After I turned off the camera, she informed Wil and me that we are the mean king and queen and that we aren't allowed to go into the garden. Hehe. Yeah, mommy and daddy have to be mean sometimes....guess she can hold it against us a bit when it comes to her pretend secret garden.
(And, no, she is not familiar with the story The Secret Garden at all. The only thing I can think of that gave her this idea is that I talked to her one time about developing a relaxation visualization and mentioned at that time that I have one I use to help myself go to sleep. I think that's what she's remembering when she asks to see my garden.)
~Regina
Labels:
aurora,
flower,
garden,
imagination,
play,
preschooler,
pretend,
secret,
video
Monday, April 15, 2013
Some Short Stories
Quinn is working on jumping. He likes to "jump" off of his mattress (which is on the floor) and thinks it's the greatest thing ever. A couple nights ago, he climbed up on our cedar chest (about 18 inches tall) and was acting like he wanted to jump. So I went over, knelt down, and reached up to take him by the waist to help him jump down safely when he suddenly threw himself off the chest and into my arms. He thought that was great and repeated it a couple times. Crazy kid!!
Wil was trying to explain what money is to Aurora.
Wil: Money is a symbolic representation of of value.
Aurora: Daddy, what did you do at work today?
Wil, trying again: Are you your name?
Aurora: No! My name is Aurora!
Wil: Well, yes, that's true....
He eventually was able to come up with a way to help her understand that her name represents her but isn't her, but I don't think she really got it.
Quinn knocked a chair over on himself and got a few bumps and bruises. After crying and cuddling a bit, he took my hand and led me to his room. Then he sat down, pointed at the TV, and said, "Toot toot!"
I think I've been using Thomas the Tank Engine to distract him from teething pain and sickness a bit too much recently...
~Regina
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Father's Day Ideas
A while back I suggested that Aurora start thinking of gift ideas for Wil for Fathers' day. Here was tonight's idea...
Aurora: I have a Fathers' Day idea!
Me: Ok! What is your idea?
A: A book!
Me: A book is an excellent idea! What kind of book do you think daddy would like?
A: A princess book for me and daddy!
Me: A princess book? What kind of princess book do you think daddy would like.
A: I don't know....A scary princess book for daddy! And a not scary one for me...Cinderella is nice...
~Regina
Aurora: I have a Fathers' Day idea!
Me: Ok! What is your idea?
A: A book!
Me: A book is an excellent idea! What kind of book do you think daddy would like?
A: A princess book for me and daddy!
Me: A princess book? What kind of princess book do you think daddy would like.
A: I don't know....A scary princess book for daddy! And a not scary one for me...Cinderella is nice...
~Regina
Saturday, April 6, 2013
The No-Cry Sleep Solution Log: Day 180--Troubleshooting
Yesterday was supposed to be a log day. I totally forgot to do it and it's probably just as well. Last night was awful. Quinn has had a tummy bug of some sort and his teeth keep bothering him off and on. I wouldn't believe that they're STILL bothering him, but the fact that he'll suddenly start drooling like a fountain and start grabbing at his teeth (the last two that are coming in) and then settle down when we give him teething gel is enough to convince me. I can't believe that we still aren't past this! It's been 4 months...this is crazy.
But I know teething will be over very, very soon, so it's time to step up our game again. We've been in a holding pattern and it's time to start adding or changing what we've been doing to gently push Quinn to sleep better. We've generally be in good habits, but not completely, so it's time to evaluate what might be keeping us from progress and commit to the new plan.
*Pulling out the book that I haven't looked at for 3 months*
Things that might be keeping us from full success (though we've seen plenty of positive change over these last few months, just not more sleep!):
1. Teething--Yep, we've got this issue.
2. Separation anxiety--Quinn definitely has this issue, but I'm not sure if it's part of his nighttime wakings. Most of the ideas Pantley offers for helping this issue are things we already do.
3. Developmental milestones or growth spurts-- Quinn has gone through several of these and recently seems to be having another developmental spurt. The way he interacts with the world seems to have changed a bit.
4. General illness and discomfort-- Comes and goes, of course. We've figured out several foods that we avoid at dinner time because they give Quinn tummy troubles. Common colds, though, we just can't avoid. Thankfully, the sickness season is almost over.
Most of these will pass with time, but we do work to minimize his discomfort. There are 4 or 5 other items that Pantley suggests as issues, but those don't apply to us.
Some other issues that I believe are impeding good sleep:
1. Putting Quinn back to bed every single time is a lot of work. I want him to sleep longer lengths of time without me, but he's still getting used to not having me next to him. Most nights, it's way easier for me to just lay down with him and sleep. It helps him and it helps me a bit. However, in the long term, it's not helping either of us. I don't sleep deeply when next to him and he wakes more frequently because he wants to nurse. But on nights when he's decided he doesn't want to sleep without me, it's hard to be getting in and out of bed every 15 minutes for hours on end when I just want to sleep. I think part of the solution to this might be having Wil put Quinn back in bed, but usually that ends in wailing and gnashing of teeth. *sigh*
2. Lack of a clear difference between naptime and bedtime. I'm debating how to accomplish a clear differentiation between these two events so that Quinn gets the cue to go back to sleep at night. I'm not sure how much difference is necessary, but I assume it varies from child to child.
3. Lack of understanding of our expectations. Perhaps Quinn doesn't understand that we want him to go back to sleep at night. I've told him, but maybe telling him isn't the right way. Pantley suggests making a sleepy-time story book featuring photos of the child. Maybe a more visual explanation would help Quinn. I have my doubts, but I think I'm willing to try it.
4. Nighttime nursings. Quinn loves the comfort of nursing. I'm doubtful that he still needs the nutrition at night, though he does actively nurse for 3-4 minutes when he wakes at night, but I think he's dependent upon that bit of cuddle time to help himself relax back to sleep. He has a lovey that he loves, he has pacifiers that he loves, but nothing can substitute for mommy's yum-yums. I am slowly trying to reduce the length of nighttime nursings, but this is a long process. I'm hoping that once teething pain is completely gone, he won't be as dependent upon the nursing to go back to sleep.
5. I'm just plain tired. It's hard to change things when you're exhausted, especially when those changes will make things worse before they get better. Part of me is still waiting on the teeth, but it's time to bite the bullet and start working on these things again.
That's all. Just troubleshooting and brainstorming ideas on how to move forward.
~Regina
But I know teething will be over very, very soon, so it's time to step up our game again. We've been in a holding pattern and it's time to start adding or changing what we've been doing to gently push Quinn to sleep better. We've generally be in good habits, but not completely, so it's time to evaluate what might be keeping us from progress and commit to the new plan.
*Pulling out the book that I haven't looked at for 3 months*
Things that might be keeping us from full success (though we've seen plenty of positive change over these last few months, just not more sleep!):
1. Teething--Yep, we've got this issue.
2. Separation anxiety--Quinn definitely has this issue, but I'm not sure if it's part of his nighttime wakings. Most of the ideas Pantley offers for helping this issue are things we already do.
3. Developmental milestones or growth spurts-- Quinn has gone through several of these and recently seems to be having another developmental spurt. The way he interacts with the world seems to have changed a bit.
4. General illness and discomfort-- Comes and goes, of course. We've figured out several foods that we avoid at dinner time because they give Quinn tummy troubles. Common colds, though, we just can't avoid. Thankfully, the sickness season is almost over.
Most of these will pass with time, but we do work to minimize his discomfort. There are 4 or 5 other items that Pantley suggests as issues, but those don't apply to us.
Some other issues that I believe are impeding good sleep:
1. Putting Quinn back to bed every single time is a lot of work. I want him to sleep longer lengths of time without me, but he's still getting used to not having me next to him. Most nights, it's way easier for me to just lay down with him and sleep. It helps him and it helps me a bit. However, in the long term, it's not helping either of us. I don't sleep deeply when next to him and he wakes more frequently because he wants to nurse. But on nights when he's decided he doesn't want to sleep without me, it's hard to be getting in and out of bed every 15 minutes for hours on end when I just want to sleep. I think part of the solution to this might be having Wil put Quinn back in bed, but usually that ends in wailing and gnashing of teeth. *sigh*
2. Lack of a clear difference between naptime and bedtime. I'm debating how to accomplish a clear differentiation between these two events so that Quinn gets the cue to go back to sleep at night. I'm not sure how much difference is necessary, but I assume it varies from child to child.
3. Lack of understanding of our expectations. Perhaps Quinn doesn't understand that we want him to go back to sleep at night. I've told him, but maybe telling him isn't the right way. Pantley suggests making a sleepy-time story book featuring photos of the child. Maybe a more visual explanation would help Quinn. I have my doubts, but I think I'm willing to try it.
4. Nighttime nursings. Quinn loves the comfort of nursing. I'm doubtful that he still needs the nutrition at night, though he does actively nurse for 3-4 minutes when he wakes at night, but I think he's dependent upon that bit of cuddle time to help himself relax back to sleep. He has a lovey that he loves, he has pacifiers that he loves, but nothing can substitute for mommy's yum-yums. I am slowly trying to reduce the length of nighttime nursings, but this is a long process. I'm hoping that once teething pain is completely gone, he won't be as dependent upon the nursing to go back to sleep.
5. I'm just plain tired. It's hard to change things when you're exhausted, especially when those changes will make things worse before they get better. Part of me is still waiting on the teeth, but it's time to bite the bullet and start working on these things again.
That's all. Just troubleshooting and brainstorming ideas on how to move forward.
~Regina
Labels:
180,
book,
brainstorming,
change,
ideas,
log,
no-cry sleep solution,
pantley,
plans,
troubleshooting
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
The No-Cry Sleep Solution Log: Day 170--Surprise! Transition out of the Crib
In a perfect world, this sleep log would have been like 60 days long and then we'd be done. But thanks to teething and moving, here we are at day 170. We've made a lot of progress, really, and I think sleeping through the night consistently is just over the hill of those last two canine teeth. Right now, that's my only goal: get this kid to sleep so I can get some sleep!
The past couple days haven't been too bad. Here's what yesterday was like...
Day 170 Sleep Log Summary
Nap: 2 hours, 20 min
Last time: 3 hours, 10 min
Night time sleep: 11 hours, 10 minutes
Last time: 8 hours, 35 minutes
Wakings: 3
Last time: too many to really count
Total sleep per day: 13 hours, 30 minutes
Last time: 11 hours, 45 minutes
Recommended amount of sleep: 13-14 hours
Looking good! And this, my friends, is with him climbing out of his crib 10 days ago and being transitioned to a regular bed in a new room. I'd say we're doing really, really well given that. For the past 5 or 6 days, he's been sleeping in his new bed all night (well, waking, being returned, sleeping, waking, etc.). I've had to join him for the last stretch of sleep in the early morning 2 or 3 of those days, but that hasn't happened for 3 or so days.
Last night was especially good because he actually slept a 5 hour stretch of sleep. That's technically sleeping through the night for a child his age. I'd love to work up to an 8 hour stretch of sleep but currently 3 hours at a time is more typical for him.
He has been in less pain from his teeth, probably because he ONLY has two coming in and they're partly poked through at this point. When he needs painkiller it's super obvious (he'll go from fine to wailing, gnawing on his fingers, and drooling like crazy in the space of 30 seconds). Because of teething being less of an issue, I've started shortening his nighttime nursings again. Some nights he's fine with that, other nights he doesn't like it. Last night, he actually woke up 15 minutes after going to sleep because he decided he needed to nurse a bit more. So, really, two of his wakings were only about 20 minutes apart.
All in all, we're slowly but surely making progress. Our progress was so much more noticeable before teething started, but we've almost survived that so I think I might be able to breathe a sigh of relief. Soon, very soon, I think we'll all be getting decent sleep.
Guess this means it's time for me to review the book again to make sure we're doing everything we can to help success... ;)
~Regina
Find all my No-Cry Sleep Solution logs here!
The past couple days haven't been too bad. Here's what yesterday was like...
Day 170 Sleep Log Summary
Nap: 2 hours, 20 min
Last time: 3 hours, 10 min
Night time sleep: 11 hours, 10 minutes
Last time: 8 hours, 35 minutes
Wakings: 3
Last time: too many to really count
Total sleep per day: 13 hours, 30 minutes
Last time: 11 hours, 45 minutes
Recommended amount of sleep: 13-14 hours
Looking good! And this, my friends, is with him climbing out of his crib 10 days ago and being transitioned to a regular bed in a new room. I'd say we're doing really, really well given that. For the past 5 or 6 days, he's been sleeping in his new bed all night (well, waking, being returned, sleeping, waking, etc.). I've had to join him for the last stretch of sleep in the early morning 2 or 3 of those days, but that hasn't happened for 3 or so days.
Last night was especially good because he actually slept a 5 hour stretch of sleep. That's technically sleeping through the night for a child his age. I'd love to work up to an 8 hour stretch of sleep but currently 3 hours at a time is more typical for him.
He has been in less pain from his teeth, probably because he ONLY has two coming in and they're partly poked through at this point. When he needs painkiller it's super obvious (he'll go from fine to wailing, gnawing on his fingers, and drooling like crazy in the space of 30 seconds). Because of teething being less of an issue, I've started shortening his nighttime nursings again. Some nights he's fine with that, other nights he doesn't like it. Last night, he actually woke up 15 minutes after going to sleep because he decided he needed to nurse a bit more. So, really, two of his wakings were only about 20 minutes apart.
All in all, we're slowly but surely making progress. Our progress was so much more noticeable before teething started, but we've almost survived that so I think I might be able to breathe a sigh of relief. Soon, very soon, I think we'll all be getting decent sleep.
Guess this means it's time for me to review the book again to make sure we're doing everything we can to help success... ;)
~Regina
Find all my No-Cry Sleep Solution logs here!
Labels:
bed,
crib,
day 170,
good night,
no-cry sleep solution,
pantley,
sleep,
teething,
transition
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Goodnight, Little Quinn
Quinn is at such a sweet age. He's definitely a toddler but sometimes still a baby.
Tonight when it was bedtime (and it was definitely bedtime) he decided he didn't want to be put down. He laid down on my chest and snuggled there for a good 40 minutes. As much as I love snuggling with him, he was needing to go to sleep and there are a few things I like to get done around the house without the kids running around (like folding laundry!). So I had to figure out a way to get him to move off my chest to his pillow, but he wasn't very open to that idea...
I finally thought of something that might or might not work. He was starting to get restless and kick his feet, so I grabbed a foot, kissed it, and said, "Goodnight, little feet." Then I repeated with the other one. Quinn loved that so much that he had me do it two or three times more, then I covered his feet up with the covers. Next I kissed his belly--creating many giggles--and said, "Goodnight, little tummy!" Then I moved on to each of his hands, his nose, his eyes, cheeks, and head. Finally, I gave him a hug and said, "Goodnight, little Quinn! Now it's time for you to lay down on your pillow." And...he did!
I covered him up, gave him a few more kisses and he waved to me as I left the room. He was asleep within 5 minutes. Now that is what you call serendipity. :) Who knows if it will work tomorrow, but I'm pretty sure he's going to want me to do it again. What a cutie.
~Regina
Tonight when it was bedtime (and it was definitely bedtime) he decided he didn't want to be put down. He laid down on my chest and snuggled there for a good 40 minutes. As much as I love snuggling with him, he was needing to go to sleep and there are a few things I like to get done around the house without the kids running around (like folding laundry!). So I had to figure out a way to get him to move off my chest to his pillow, but he wasn't very open to that idea...
I finally thought of something that might or might not work. He was starting to get restless and kick his feet, so I grabbed a foot, kissed it, and said, "Goodnight, little feet." Then I repeated with the other one. Quinn loved that so much that he had me do it two or three times more, then I covered his feet up with the covers. Next I kissed his belly--creating many giggles--and said, "Goodnight, little tummy!" Then I moved on to each of his hands, his nose, his eyes, cheeks, and head. Finally, I gave him a hug and said, "Goodnight, little Quinn! Now it's time for you to lay down on your pillow." And...he did!
I covered him up, gave him a few more kisses and he waved to me as I left the room. He was asleep within 5 minutes. Now that is what you call serendipity. :) Who knows if it will work tomorrow, but I'm pretty sure he's going to want me to do it again. What a cutie.
~Regina
Saturday, March 16, 2013
Photo dump: My parents come to visit
Momma came down for several days to watch the kids while Wil and I went to a conference. She did a great job distracting them each morning as we left.
Poppa visited a couple times, too. Quinn seems to be very interested following him around and doing what he does. :)
And at the end of the week, we visited a REAL (historic) train station!
Waiting for the train.
On the train!
Momma with two of her grandbabies! :)
~Regina
Poppa visited a couple times, too. Quinn seems to be very interested following him around and doing what he does. :)
And at the end of the week, we visited a REAL (historic) train station!
Waiting for the train.
On the train!
Momma with two of her grandbabies! :)
~Regina
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Vroom, Vroom, Vroom
Hey, look! A video! Do you remember what those are? ;) Even more amazing, the kids are playing NICELY together! Aurora is so tolerant of Quinn in this video that it's incredible. :)
~Regina
Sunday, March 10, 2013
Photo dump: Aquarium and Kiwi Crate
Our first visit to the Tennessee Aquarium since returning to Tennessee.
Quinn wasn't too sure about the butterflies...
And that same afternoon, we decided to do this month's Kiwi Crate!
We built a park...
...and made some fuzzy friends.
~Regina
Quinn wasn't too sure about the butterflies...
And that same afternoon, we decided to do this month's Kiwi Crate!
We built a park...
...and made some fuzzy friends.
~Regina
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)